Waking Up Whitney

Posted on March 1, 2021 by Mike Shortall

Dreams are fascinating. Completely unreal at times, yet not always memorable or even remembered. They can also be revealing … for the Dreamer, and those in their immediate vicinity.

Certainly, a sudden middle-of-the-night outburst can be fun, funny, sweet, even cute. But they be very rare occurrences in my experience.

With that as prologue I relate the experience I Saturday night, when I was suddenly awaken from a deep, peaceful sleep.

It went like this … (Turn the volume up!j

That’s right … the full-throated emotion, a career high point of Whitney Houston, singing the theme song from The Bodyguard! And I have to admit, it sounded pretty good!

My bed buddy’s performance ended shortly after that brief but awe-inspiring chorus, as I opted to awaken Houston’s protégée. I gently (kinda) nudged Whitney.2 awake in mid-chorus.

“Hey, Whoever-you-are … Wake up! You were singing Whitney Houston.”

“No, I wasn’t.”

“You must have been dreaming. You were singing The Bodyguard!”

And I break into my own screeching rendition of Whitney being attacked by a mountain lion.

“YOU were dreaming!”, she claims.

(OK, that’s not out of the question. I mean, it was a surprisingly impressive performance. But no, it definitely wasn’t the Real Whitney. It had to be What’s-Her-Name.)

All you Dream Interpreters must be thinking … Oh, how wonderful To be soooo in love as to belt out one of the most passionate love songs from the ’90s. She must really, really LOVE The Cranky Man!

But I’m pretty sure – somewhere she called me “Kevin” …

Ma-ma-ma My Corona! Day 9

Posted on March 21, 2020 by Mike Shortall

As this unprecedented health event continues to progress with its uncertainty, stressors, and a drastic curtailing of normal life, I dedicate My Corona – Day 9 to a nameless fellow coworker. Let’s call him Bob.

Bob – on one of our last days in the office – attempted to poke fun at my role as office DJ by asking me why I wasn’t playing the song “My Corona”. I told him – somewhat indignantly – that the song was The Knack‘s “My Sharona“. Little did I know until I checked that there actually was a parody song called “My Corona”.

I took the liberty of previewing it. And my recommendation is to skip it; but I link it here just in case you are not already depressed enough being sequestered like a petulant 3-year-old in “timeout”. Remember you were warned.

The following version is a bit better … as in a bit better than being stuck in your house with eight of your offspring all under the age of 6.

But this extremely short video is by far the best so far …

My obvious point here is that with all the stress, uncertainty, hyper media coverage, doom and gloom predictions, etc., etc. … it will be our ability to maintain perspective; use common sense; and maybe laugh a little at our human frailty are our best attributes that might just help in getting through all this.

Keep safe. Be smart. Enjoy the time with those most important to you … despite how “scary” that might be.

Jazz Atonement

Posted on April 19, 2011 by Mike Shortall

Since I last went off on how irritating I find true jazz, I’ve had a few people asking me why I dislike jazz/hate America. Some of them, including a few friends, expressed bewilderment at my distaste for jazz. So I have to backtrack a bit from my I-hate-jazz harangue.

I don’t hate all jazz. I don’t really “hate” any jazz. I just don’t get what I guess is called “traditional jazz” or what enthusiasts might call bebop or free jazz, the No Limits-No Boundaries type. It is jazz that – to me – has little of the traditional qualities of traditional music, which – I guess – is the point of that particular jazz genre.

Maybe that’s why it makes my head hurt. It hurts just thinking about it.

But there is a wide range of jazz that I like. The works of Grover Washington, Jr., Herbie Hancock, Maynard Ferguson, Tower of Power, Bruce Hornsby (The piano and guitar is – in my opinion – much more conducive to pain-free jazz than is brass.) … And at this very moment I’m listening to some Yusef Lateef from his album Eastern Sounds.

So rest easy, jazz aficionados, it ain’t all bad in my humble opinion.